Maria in Vancouver
Living Authentically in 2024
Thank you, 2023! Hello and Welcome 2024! A new year is always a great way to toss one’s old ways and in with the new. What better way to start your new year by making sure you start living your life authentically? What does living authentically even mean? Well, it means being honest with ourselves; it means living according to our core values and what we truly believe in life even if it means we might not be liked for it; and lastly, living authentically means living according to your own rules and not dictated by society. Living authentically means we never have to put any mask on or portray a role; it means we can simply be us.
Photo courtesy of the author.
You may even ask: why is it even important to live authentically? First and foremost, it’s beneficial for our mental health and wellbeing. You don’t need to live a life based on lies and pretensions. When you live genuinely, you don’t have to put up a facade; you don’t have to invent stories. Because when you live a lie, you’re not really lying to others — you are lying to yourself. You are only being deceiving to yourself. That’s a lot to carry on a daily basis. It’s burdensome and can harm your emotional well being.
Photo courtesy of the author.
Other benefits of living genuinely includes being able to build longer lasting relationships. When you are true to yourself, real people tend to gravitate towards you. You attract those who are like minded to you. You get to earn other people’s respect and trust. Together, you get to build meaningful relationships based on truth and integrity. On top of all these, being real builds self confidence and improves your creativity because when you’re true to yourself, you tend to pursue interests and goals that you are truly passionate about.
Now that we’ve established why it’s a must to live with veracity, let’s find out how we can achieve this. And here are the ways:
Photo courtesy of the author.
VISUALISE THE REAL YOU AND GET TO KNOW YOURSELF. Believe it or not, everything in this world starts with visualisation. Create a board of images of what you see yourself as. What kind of person do you see yourself as? More importantly, what kind of person do you aspire to be? Better yet, what would make you happy and complete as an individual? Do a lot of inner reflection. Make a list of your positives and negatives. Get to know yourself. Get to know the things you really like in life: music, arts, politics, beliefs, and values. Honesty starts from within. You have to be true to yourself before you can be true to others.
Photo courtesy of the author.
CONSTANTLY FOSTER SELF AWARENESS AND AVOID BEING A PEOPLE PLEASER. When you have pinpointed who you really are, what you truly believe in, and what you stand for in life, then you must be consistent with having self-awareness. After all, having self-awareness is the cornerstone of living authentically. You always have to be aware if you are being true to yourself. You don’t need to be a people pleaser. You don’t have to do things you don’t really want to do just for the sake of making others happy. It’s not being selfish, it’s being honest about yourself and above all to others. Why subject yourself to doing things you’re totally not onboard with? Do yourself a favour, start being true to yourself instead of punishing yourself!
Photo courtesy of the author.
EMBRACE YOUR POSITIVES AND STRENGTHS. When we embrace our strengths and positives, it doesn’t mean that we are being boastful or arrogant. Not at all. It means we are unlocking our potential and embracing the qualities that we can use to contribute in this world, in the community that we all belong to. When we are aware and confident about the positive qualities that we bring into this world, then we are being true to ourselves. It means we are aware of what we are capable of and how we can use our potential to better serve our communities.
Photo courtesy of the author.
DON’T BE AFRAID TO BE YOU AND ACCEPT YOUR IMPERFECTIONS. Know this and memorise this: Damn what others may think! Being your true self in a world where others are trying to constantly turn you into someone else has got to be your own best achievement! You should not let yourself get affected by how others see you. You know yourself better than what others claim to be! The strongest factor of living a happier and more authentic life is by having a great self-esteem. Don’t let others judge you and take your self-esteem away from you. Accept your imperfections and flaws. Don’t be too hard on yourself. Admit and accept your mistakes and learn from these. Use your failures as stepping stones to improving yourself.
Photo courtesy of the author.
EXPRESS YOURSELF AND START USING YOUR VOICE BY SPEAKING YOUR TRUTH. When you have learned more about yourself as a person, your likes and dislikes, what you believe and don’t believe in; when you have totally embraced your true self, your positives and negatives; when you are constantly practising self-awareness and when you’re no longer afraid to be you and be comfortable with your imperfections — you can start expressing yourself and start using your voice by speaking your truth. Your truth won’t always be popular with others. In fact, you’ll be criticised and bashed for voicing your truth. But you’re totally fine with that. You know that what matters is that you’ve been true to your values, to your beliefs, and to yourself. Oh and don’t be shy to speak your truth, to express yourself assertively. Don’t be afraid to share your thoughts and opinions.
Photo courtesy of the author.
FIND YOUR TRIBE AND SUPPORT SYSTEM. When you already know who you are as an individual and what your beliefs are, then you must carefully choose who you allow to be in your life. Choose your support system carefully. By all means, let go and get rid of relationships that are toxic! It doesn’t matter if they are family members — if your relationship with them only makes you miserable — get away from them! It’s perfectly okay to be estranged from your family especially if your relationship with them is toxic. You can genuinely apologise for your actions and mistakes for not making your relationship work but on the other hand, it’s also okay to walk away from those you don’t see eye to eye even if they’re family. Don’t feel guilty. Your mental health is important. Instead, focus on finding your tribe.
Family doesn’t have to be the people who raised you. It can be in the form of complete strangers who you click with and genuinely bond with. You have the power to choose the right people you are comfortable to have within your life. When you surround yourself with people who you totally connect with, who support you and your life goals — then you’re living your life authentically. You always have the power to walk away from those who are naysayers and who cause you nothing but hurt and negativity. You have the power to be with those who encourage you to be the real you without any drama.
Photo courtesy of the author.
BEING ABLE TO DISTINGUISH EXTERNAL VERSUS INTERNAL INFLUENCES. When you are able to identify and distinguish the huge differences between internal and external influences in your daily lives, then you are being true to yourself. When you are able to do these, you are able to make daily life decisions with much more clarity and ease. Always reflect and ask yourself these questions: “Is this what I truly want in my life right now?” “Is this what I truly believe in?” “Am I doing this because I want to or am I merely being pressured by peers or by society?” “Will this make me feel comfortable and happy?” You don’t have to be a follower like a flock of sheep. You need to just be yourself and walk your own path regardless if anyone follows you or not. Everything you do and say is because of you and what you stand for in life. It’s being classic and original instead of following the trend. Just use this scenario as an example: would you rather be a fake Chanel bag or an authentic Chanel bag? Plain and simple which is the truth. Bottom line is this: when you live a fake existence, you are only fooling yourself and not others; whereas if you choose to live a genuine existence, you are gaining the trust and respect of others because the truth always comes out.
Photo courtesy of the author.
ALWAYS KEEP AN OPEN MIND. Just as you are being open and true to yourself, it is also important and a must to have an open mind and accepting of others and their views in life. You will always be entitled to your own beliefs and opinions but also respect the fact that others are also entitled to their own beliefs and views. The key is to be magnanimous and open to others’ points of view. You need to respect others and their stance on life. Always choose to be diplomatic and respectful at all times. Always learn and practise the fine art of learning to agree to disagree. In this manner, you avoid unwanted conflicts.
Just remember that when you choose to live authentically, you are choosing to follow your heart’s content and desires. You are in total control of your path and destiny. You do not have to kowtow to anyone. You place yourself in scenarios and situations where you are totally comfortable and at ease. You attract people who are in the same mindset as you are. Life becomes easier to handle and navigate. It becomes less complicated. When you live your life according to your values, beliefs, and rules, you experience living in freedom.
Above all, living your authentic life will make you happier and less guilty of the unnecessary stress in life. When you live genuinely, you become more creative and you live in the flow of your life. Now more than ever is the right time to be real with yourself, being true to yourself, to what you believe in and above all, what you truly stand for in your life. Don’t be ashamed and be afraid to be your REAL YOU!!!
A grateful creature with a passion for writing.
#MariainVancouver
