On National Best Friends’ Day, weird and untold stories of best buddies are spilled!
Our best friend has seen us not only in our best version and absolute worst but also the funniest, craziest and the weirdest version. But the beauty in this friendship is that we can be whatever version of ourselves in front of them with no judgments attached. (Pixabay photo)
Having a best friend, they say, is like having another sibling from another mother. Just like any brother or sister, our best friend is someone whom we get along really well and at the same time, whom we can fight well. They are the ones whom we can talk about anything and who can be harshly honest to us about everything. Somehow, they know us better than we know ourselves. They know exactly when we’re bending the truth and know how to lighten up our mood.
Our best friend has seen us not only in our best version and absolute worst but also the funniest, craziest and the weirdest version. But the beauty in this friendship is that we can be whatever version of ourselves in front of them with no judgments attached. Truth is, they are actually at the same level of weird as you are. They make the same unnecessary noises that you do and still understand what you try to communicate, text you although you sit beside each other, insult your enemies, or even something as gross as smear their boogers on you.
The thing about this relationship is that it also does not hide any stories may it be the little ones, the nasty ones, the darkest ones, or the wildest one which is fun to bring to the surface at some point in time. As the world celebrates the National Best Friends’ Day this June 8, the Philippine Canadian Inquirer (PCI) takes the lid off more weird and untold stories of some of these best buddies that for sure many others ‘know the feeling’ too.
The Gross Stuff
Ever since we’re young, our parents have taught us basic table manners and etiquette like to wash our hands first before eating, chew with our mouth closed, to not talk when our mouth is full, to never ever stuff our mouth, and even to refrain from saying any nasty words when everyone is eating.
Perhaps normal people’s reactions whenever someone mentions something distasteful in front of the dining table is that their happily-eating-faces will automatically turn to disgusted ones — but this wasn’t the case for Aldyn and his best friends, Seth and Razil.
Aldyn, 22, met his best friends during his first year in college, first semester to be exact, but in different subjects. Aldyn shared that it was Seth, 22, and Razil, 24, who left an “impression” on him since, as a freshman, he was looking for someone who would not only become his friend, but also someone who would help him boost his academic performance.
“Before kasi, I’m looking for someone who loves to excel in class someone na hindi mabarkada (who does not neglect his studies for friends),” he recalls. “So siguro (maybe) for a month or two, sila lang ‘yung madalas kong nilalapitan, kinakausap (they are the ones whom I always approach and talk to).”
It was only during their second semester as first-year college students when Seth and Razil finally met each other as Aldyn introduced them to one another. Since then, the three of them cannot be separated from one another, even during their meal time at school. Every time they eat their lunch, Aldyn shares that one of them suddenly always feels the ‘need to take a dump.’
“For example si Seth natatae, sasabihin nya sa isa sa amin, then kami namin imbis na isikreto namin inuulit-ulit namin ng malakas, ‘Ano natatae ka? Natatae ka Seth (For example, Seth needs to take a dump. He will tell one of us, but instead of keeping it a secret, we will say it again loudly like, ‘What? Do you need to poop? Do you need to poop, Seth)?’” Aldyn says, as he and Razil intentionally grab other people’s attention for their friend. But their ‘mission’ to make Seth as the center of embarrassment does not end there. After having one of the greatest moments in his life, going back to their table, Seth will be welcomed with more humiliating questions like “Ano tapos ka na tumae (Are you done taking a dump)?” and “Nagbuhas ka ba (Did you wash)?” which are loudly asked by the two.
Aldyn says they always tease each other like that during meal time, eventually making it their ‘habit’ as best friends.
“Kaya kapag may nakakapansin, minsan tumatawa na lang [kami] ng patago eh, tapos ‘yung friend naman namin mahihiya lang ganun (That’s why if someone notices, we just laugh secretly, then our friend will feel ashamed),” Aldyn laughingly says.
The Highlight of Drunk Stories
Getting drunk with your best friend is indeed all fun and games… well until you wake up the next morning having a sore head, stirring stomach, and your buddy enumerating all the crazy antics you did while you’re drunk.
Realizing those, you can’t help but to bury your head under a pillow, also trying to bury that humiliating drunken moment of yours as deep as it possibly can and never talk about it if possible. But with your best friend being the living proof of that ‘tale,’ bet that it would be hard for you to shake the feeling of shame.
Speaking with PCI, Diane, 22, recalls the night when she and her best friend Ari, who’s also 22, had a drinking session at the latter’s house as their way to de-stress. Perhaps not minding the number of shots her best friend had taken as they chat, Diane admits that she was not quick to notice that Ari was already completely drunk.
“Hindi ko naman alam na lasing na siya, pero masakit na raw yung ulo niya (I didn’t know that she was already drunk; she just said that she is having a headache),” Diane shares. Ari asked Diane to accompany her to the bed because she was feeling sleepy at that time. But just when Diane thought her best friend would actually sleep, she found herself watching her best friend throw up in the restroom.
“Hindi niya [na] pala kaya lumakad [sa sobrang kalasingan], [kaya] gumapang siya papuntang kama (She cannot walk [because she was way too drunk], [that’s why] she crawled to get to her bed),” Although it was unfortunate for her not being able to record Ari’s drunk moment as addition to her ‘throwback’ chest, her best friend’s siblings, however, were there to witness the very scene.
Being the caring person that she is, Diane cleaned off her pal’s semi-digested food, a.k.a. puke, off the bathroom floor, while Ari sleeps it off.
The same thing also happened to these other girl best friends, Jenny and Marivic, who have been sticking together for 20 years. Taking a trip back to the days when they made fool of themselves, Jenny, 42, remembered the time when she and Marivic, 49, also had a drinking session and both of them could not take it anymore.
“Gapang kami papuntang CR (We crawled to get to the restroom),” says Jenny, “Tapos naghilamos kami habang umiiyak. [Parang] mga baliw lang (Then we washed our faces while sobbing. We’re like crazy people)!”
Jenny says she couldn’t completely remember what exactly happened that day, but the reason why they both ended up crying was that she was carried away when Marivic shared her love life problems.
But if you thought that Ari, Diane, Jenny, and Marivic’s stories are already that embarrassing, wait until you hear the drunk night story of these three college best friends named Kristine, Colyn, and Maria.
It was Kristine’s first time to have a hardcore drink with Colyn at Maria’s apartment, but since the latter has classes the next day, only two will indulge themselves. Continuing with her story, Kristine bares that it was her and Colyn’s long-time plan and that ‘historic’ day came just in time because both of them had been going through difficult times: Kristine was at the stage of moving on from her ex-boyfriend, while Colyn had other personal problems. We all know that this kind of situation calls for a drinking session in an attempt to forget our problems for a while, so the two best friends pushed through with their plan, even if it meant crashing in Maria’s apartment.
Kristine shares that Colyn told her she was the “veteran” drinker whenever she goes out with her other friends meaning – she was the most responsible drinker, having to take care of her friends who were possessed by the spirit of alcohol. Based on her best friend’s story, Kristine felt at ease since at least one of them will stay sober just in case everything turns into a mess. Or so she thought.
“Na-excite ako kasi ‘yun ‘yung time na gusto ko alamin ‘yung alcohol tolerance ko. Eh ‘di bili kami. (I got excited because that was the time when I wanted to know my alcohol tolerance so we just got it on and bought drinks),” she narrates.
Kristine says Colyn poured large amounts of alcohol in a drinking glass — take note: not a shot glass, but a BIG drinking glass. “For some reason, medyo mabilis kami nalasing kasi ang likot-likot niya sa kama tapos nahihiga pa kami. Ako nag–oopen pa ko sa ex ko while drunk texting tapos si bakla, aba nakikinig daw pero nakapikit na siya (we got drunk immediately because Colyn keeps on moving around on the bed while we keep on laying down. I was opening up to her about my ex while drunk texting, but Colyn who claims that she was listening had her eyes closed already)!”
She was all ears and even giving advice to Colyn when the latter rants about life like how she really wanted to have a boyfriend, but every time it is Kristine’s turn to open up, Colyn just told her, “Nakikinig ako ah. ‘Di ko lang naiintindihan [sinasabi mo] (I’m listening, I swear. I just don’t understand what are you saying).”
One bottle was not enough when the duo downed it so Maria bought them another before sleeping. So the saga continues for the two until minutes later, Colyn broke a bottle when she accidentally kicked it. Maria, who was woken by the noise, cleaned up the broken glass.
Suddenly, Colyn went to the bathroom, while Kristine was telling her in jest that she might not be able to come out because she might have passed out inside, but Colyn insisted that she won’t. Kristine, on the other hand, asked Maria for a plastic bag to throw up in. “Sorry din ako nang sorry habang natatawa. Naka-dalawang plastic ako pero natapon ko pa sa basurahan (I kept saying sorry while laughing. I used two plastic bags but was able to throw it in the trash can).”
Kristine was done with her business and already fell asleep but Colyn was still inside the bathroom, prompting Maria to knock on the door. At the time Kristine woke up, Colyn, who went inside with full clothes on, just got out of the bathroom with her pants missing. It was found hanging on the sink with her vomit on it, so Maria lent her a towel.
“Sa pagkakaalam ko, wala siya underwear nun kasi inaasar ko siya na tatanggalin ko ‘yung tapis niya, tapos wala nga raw (As far as I can remember, she was not wearing underwear that time because I was teasing her that I will take off her towel, then she confirmed she wasn’t really wearing one).”
It was not the grossest thing, though as Kristine says she discovered something she described as “light brown beads” on Colyn’s hair, which the latter smeared on her after she pointed it out.
“Nung paggising namin ng umaga, nalaman ko na lang na sukang namumuo pala ‘yung nasa buhok niya (When we woke up the next morning, I found out that it was dry vomit that was in her hair).”
Colyn told Kristine that it was her first time to be that drunk. “Siguro raw kasi nasa apartment kami tapos kami naman kasama niya kaya parang alam niyang ‘di niya kailangan mag-alaga (Maybe because we were in the apartment and that Maria and I were the ones who were with her that’s why she felt at ease to not look after anyone).”
Partners in Crime
Having a best friend is also automatically having a partner in crime who, no matter what mistakes or how many you make, will always be there for you. You form the best alliance in whatever you do, including in terms of covering up each other’s lies and excuses. If only we were to pay a dollar for each lie we came up with, it would not be surprising if many of us would now be flat broke.
Talking about “broke,” Mhonique, 28, recounts the time when her best friend Debra, who was then a high school student, was in dire need of extra cash. As a student, we all went through the penniless period in our lives which tempted us to ask extra budget from our parents. But knowing that our mom and dad won’t easily hand us cash, we are forced to tell excuses in order for us to get money from them. We know from the very start that it is not right to lie to our parents because not only do we lose their trust but we hurt them as well without us knowing it. But there are episodes in our lives, like these, that we cannot be as truthful as possible with them so we make excuses.
Some of us would perhaps lie about buying a book needed for school or mention so-called group projects that need financial contribution, when in fact, we’re just going to spend it for shopping, dating, or on other leisure activities.
As her strategy, Mhonique says Debra, who’s also 28, would trick her mother to buy her “World of Fun (WOF)” tickets. In the Philippines, WOF is one of the attractions inside malls where people can play a variety of games such as basketball, video games, driving, dance and music, shooting, dispensing games, and a lot more. If you choose to play their redemption games, you have more chances of winning WOF tickets which can be exchanged for redemption prizes like toys, candies, school supplies, gadgets, and appliances, depending on the amount of the tickets you have earned. Those who have played at the WOF know that the tickets cannot be replaced for monetary value, but lucky for Debra, she managed to swap it with bills.
“Wala siyang pera tapos plano naming magsine. So ang gagawin niya, ibebenta niya ‘yung WOF ticket sa nanay niya since hindi naman tinitignan ng mama niya anong ticket, basta sasabihin niya may raffle ticket from school [tapos] bibilhin na lang ng mama niya lahat (She doesn’t have the money yet we plan to see a movie. So what she will do is sell her WOF ticket to her mother since her mom won’t check what kind of ticket is it, Debra will say it is a raffle ticket from school then her mom will just buy it all),” utters Mhonique.
Mhonique was wondering how come her best friend’s mom did not notice that it was an arcade ticket, but Debra simply told her “hindi naman daw hinahanap o tinatanong nasaan [‘yung] ticket, basta ang tanong lang magkano ba (that her mom does not look for nor ask where are the tickets, she just asks how much it is).”
Aside from lying to get additional cash, at one point, we also invent stories to our parents when we want to go out with our best friends without them knowing. Others might ask permission first from their parents before they head out, making excuses like staying over at their friend’s house or having “group studies,” but Yahm, 33, and her best friend Jonay, 35, did the opposite.
Without their family knowing that they left the house, the two went out late at night wearing jogging attires. “Tumakas kami ng bahay, 4 a.m. na kami nakarating (We ran away from the house and went back at 4 a.m.),” says Yahm. She told her mom that she and Jonay came out to “jog,” but they actually headed out for a drink.
“Sasabihin non, ‘Saan na naman kayo galing?’ tapos sasabihin lang naming ‘Nagjogging kami, ‘nay (She will ask, ‘Where did you go?’ then we will just say, ‘We jogged, mom’)!’” Yahm chips in, laughing while remembering it.
Yes, it is fun to remember the excuses we made to our parents, but also keep in mind that it is not fun to make fool of our parents. There are white lies of our buddies that we can tolerate, but if you’re truly his or her “best friend,” you would choose not to let that deed happen again.
No holds barred
As what is stated in the intro, we do not limit ourselves to the things we tell to our best friends – we just say, with no filter, anything we would never dream of confiding with anyone else. Like our words, we also do not restrict ourselves from doing whatever we want to do in front of our friends, from acting cute to being crazy and weird and to being dirty-minded.
Having been inseparable since their first year in high school, Jemary, 24, has grown really comfortable with her gay best friend, Lorenz, to the point that she would not mind doing stuff that a ‘girl usually does not do when a guy is around.’ “Nagbibihis ako sa harap nya, tapos siya ‘yung umiiwas (I change my clothes in front of him; he avoids to look at me),” she says.
It is not just the boys, though. Some girls are just comfortable changing their clothes in front of anyone; the same is true with other guys. In Lorenz’ case, he may be a gay but he is still a guy and Jemary couldn’t care less.
Another thing is that, this may sound even weirder and awkward to some, but Jemary says she really does love touching Lorenz’s “pwetchi (butt)” and “boobs.”
Their no-holds-barred friendship also includes their hobby of ‘pogi-gazing,’ where they just stay in a place and scan their eyes in the crowd to look for good-looking men. “’Yung motto namin, ‘Pag may gwapo, tambay tayo. ‘Pag walang gwapo uwi na tayo (Our motto is that, if there’s handsome guy, we stay. If none, then we go home),’” Jemary shares.
These weird secret stories are the centerpiece, if not all, of many friendships that we love to look back at, laugh, and share especially on this day where we honor one of the very special someones in our lives whom we call our “best friends.” Happy Best Friends’ Day to all best pals out there! Cheers to our friendship and many more years of togetherness and putting up with each other’s craziness!
