Caring for the country from miles away: Judith Gonzales

For Judith Gonzales, a proud mother, caregiver-turned-educational-director, a community leader and an advocate of supporting caregivers in Canada, and a Filipino who loves her country fiercely, having a brave heart—despite many difficulties—was what enabled her to achieve success.

There are many Judiths—they who had to leave the country to search for jobs in foreign lands because of rampant corruption, unemployment, economic downturn and confronting a host of the country’s problems.

But there are a few Judiths who succeed.

And even fewer who do not forget that they are Filipinos; those who will always be proud of where they came from.

“I love my country, and I am still quite proud to be a Filipino,” she said.

She reasons, however, that there was no security for her children in the country—either financial, or physical, hence her decision.

Because being a mother is her top priority; her children’s welfare, primordial.

“If I turn back the time, I will still do what I did, leaving our home country. [S]eeking greener pastures is fighting for my children’s future,” she said.

Live-in caregiver

In her past life, Judith was working in the business and education industry. Not very happily, however, because come pay day, it becomes apparent to her that her income is not enough to sustain her growing family’s needs.

Then came the opportunity to become a live-in caregiver in Canada in 2001.

“The short [period for the] process[ing] of documents and being accepted in the program attracts women to apply and leave the country.  It was around this time as well that Philippine was in severe economic downturn.  I was one of them who pursu[ed] opportunities Canada can offer.”

She will be the first to say she had a lot to learn when she first came to Canada.

“When I first arrived here, my first bus ride experience was very funny. In the Philippines we have the liberty to stop anytime [or anywhere] we want.  Here you have to stop in a designated bus stop. I got mad at the driver when he did not stop the bus in the area where I needed to get off. One of the Filipinas who was in the bus told me that I cannot stop anytime and anywhere I wanted; that it has to be in the designated bus stop and to just walk to where I wanted to go. I ended up apologizing to the bus driver,” she says.

Indeed, living in Canada was a welcome and fun experience; however, it was also a painful one.

“LCP [Live-in Caregiver Program] has a price to pay. Families fall apart, long separation, triggers betrayal of trust between husband and wife. I was one of those.”

She says her separation from her husband was a bittersweet experience but it was one she took positively.

Because more painful was her separation from her children. But this too came to pass.

“It was in 2008, when I was able to get reunited with my children… I was lucky most of them are grownups when they got here. We lived, in a 3-bedroom apartment which cost us $1,800 a month including all utilities.”

When her children came, Judith had to double her efforts spending each day working part-time. “Being a single parent, it was difficult for me to cope with the expenses at first. I have 4 kids, Xymon eldest was 18, Xyrus was 17, Benz was 16 and April was 10.

“I was working as a bookkeeper weekdays and I accepted cleaning jobs on the weekends.”

Opportunities for advancement came, but she said no.

“My employers in the manufacturing business were offering me to get trained as an office manager during my employment with them. I was not happy with my job, though I have a BBA degree, Bachelor of Science in Business Administration with Accountancy as my major field, I [found that it was] not the career I wanted to pursue.

“I quit my job and went back to school.”

Judith focused on her passion to help the vulnerable segments of Canadian society. In 2010, she decided to take a Diploma Program in Social Services.

She says of this experience and her family’s support, “I am so fortunate that my son grew up with family values. They are the source of my strength, my motivation to continue dreaming and achieve a better life that we all can enjoy. It was painful to see that my son of 18 years old was not in school and [was] working full time as a factory [worker] to support the entire family. I was on OSAP [Ontario Student Assistance Program], his three siblings were all in school. He was the only one paying all our expenses.”

Her decision to focus on school and her advocacies has proven correct, however. She said, “I was hoping to land a job in a non-profit organization as a counsellor. However, 3 months prior to my graduation, I got a job offer from an employment agency as Educational Director of the company.  It challenged me as the job descriptions perfectly suit[ed] my BBA and my social work skills. As I promised to my eldest son Xymon, we bought a house in 2011 and move out from the apartment where we lived.”

Caring for the Filipinos, a symbol of nationalism

Since 2003, Judith was involved in helping her kababayans, her way of showing how much she still loved the Philippines though she was miles away.

“I have passion in helping people, that’s why I was able to lead the Fil-core Support Group since 2003 and saw the progress of  the organization for it was built with humble leadership, cohesiveness of group members and true sisterhood. This organization is a refuge to live-in caregiver participants.”

The Fil-Core Support Group is a non-profit organization which aims to support caregivers and new immigrants who wanted to pursue their careers for a better life in Canada through contributing to their educational development and social advancement.

“This organization grows and progresses; [it is] known by the community for its consistency in empowering live-in caregiver participants in their pursuit of developing themselves personally, professionally and giving back to community. The programs and events held by the organization trains and mentors leaders as well as supports caregivers and communities in need,” Judith says.

Following her path

To those who want to follow Judith’s path, she will be the first to say that it is not an easy one, and definitely not one that she will recommend. The experience will definitely test the strongest of families; and render asunder the most noble of intentions.

“I would recommend to leave a family only when it’s needed and when strong family values are practiced within. No matter where you are [and if strong family values are intact], you will be confident that your kids will not be [led] astray. My family took over when I left [for] Canada. My sisters and parents helped look after my children. It never [occurred] to me, that my kids will do something that will ruin their lives, although there were also fears [of that] when my family was falling apart. I thought that will affect my children’s perspective.

Thank GOD, they were very supportive to us—to both myself and their dad.  They understood the situation. Despite what happened, I managed to keep my children’s respect for their dad [in the acknowledgment that] there is no perfect family in this world.”

For her professional success, she credits her Fil-Core Support Group. “Where I am right now, career-wise, [my] credibility and integrity are because of my hands on training in leading the Fil-Core Support group.

“Being an advocate, meeting lots of people helped me broaden my network. [It helped] me make connections and use them in a manner that benefitted my marketing skills professionally. Marketing is building relationships. This is my strength, HUMBLE LEADERSHIP. No matter where I go, which company I work for, I make sure that I am an integral part of their company.”

She also says that her vast experience in the marketing field made her a better person. “I enjoy my work. Being in an education industry helps me tap different communities. I learned to understand and respect each culture. I know I am making a difference in [the lives of] each person I meet.”

For Judith, one thing is for sure: “Success comes so natural if you work by heart.” challenges are opportunities.”

Judith, the woman for whom challenges are opportunities, leaves us all this piece of advice: “Just be who you are, keep the feet on the ground. Challenges can be very taxing, do not give up!”