It took two years for a mother to open up about the tragic passing of her daughter, but Shamaine Buencamino chooses this path in order to raise awareness on mental health.
Grief filled showbiz two years ago when 15-year-old Julia, daughter of renowned actor and actress Nonie Buencamino and Shamaine, faced the end of her life. Julia was playing a role on the morning series “Oh My G!” then.
In a “Magandang Buhay” episode, Shamaine looked back to the moment when she found Julia lifeless in her arms.
At first, the actress heaved out a sigh, releasing some tension, like expecting the question to come. But bravely, Shamaine faces the audience and starts speaking.
“Alam mo ‘yung sa eksena ng may namamatay sa kunwari sa family sa pelikula sa TV ‘di ba iyak agad? ‘Di ganun naramdaman ko parang tumahimik mundo, wala kong naririnig (You know those scenes when a member in the family dies in a movie or TV, there tears come out immediately right? That was not what I felt. The world fell silent, I could not hear anything),” she explained.
“Unfortunately for us, we were foolish. Ngayon nasasabi ko na (Now I can say it that) in hindsight, ang tanga tanga namin kasi akala namin dahil pinalaki namin silang masiyahin nabigay namin lahat ng kailangan nila okay na (we were really foolish because we thought that raising them as happy kids and giving them everything that they needed was enough),” she confessed.
Though they had a written rule in their household when it comes to privacy on journals and perhaps even artworks, Shamaine was firm in giving advice that as parents, knowing everything whether through reading of journals or checking what the children have written is important.
“Kung tiningnan ko lang [‘yung diary niya], nalaman ko meron siyang iniinda. Meron siyang sakit na mula pa nung 12 siya (If I just read her diary, I could have known what she was going through. That she had an illness since she was 12). Menor de edad pa ‘yan (She is still a minor), you should know everything,” she explained.
Shamaine was asked to give her message to Julia in which she started tearing up after words of apology and love.
“Alam ko ‘di mo kasalanan na may sakit ka. Ginagawa ko ‘to para sa’yo, para sa mga kaibigan mo, sa mga batang katulad mo (I know this is not your fault, you are ill. I am doing this for you, for your friends, and for children like you,” she said.
In memory of Julia, the Buencamino family launched “Julia Buencamino Bench Project” aiming to raise awareness that children need to open up on whatever they are going through.
According to Shamaine, the bench was a symbol that whenever one experiences depression, he/she should not go through it alone.
“’Yung (The) bench actually, that was a suggestion of a friend. In other countries kasi mayroon silang ginawang [research] na kapag ang bata ay malungkot sa recess nauupo siya sa bench (they had a research that when a kid is sad during recess, he/she sits on a bench). It’s a signal to other kids na (that) ‘I need a friend. I’m alone.’ So mas madali, mas mabilis makakuha ng kaibigan ‘yung mga batang nauupo (it is easier and faster for kids to have friends by sitting on a bench),” she explained.