In her recently launched book entitled “Mommy Dear: Our Special Love,” actress and comedienne Candy Pangilinan shared her journey as a mother of a child with special needs.
Inside her book, Candy narrated the rises and falls of raising her son, Quentin, who has autism. The Comedienne added that her book also tackles about her sail towards acceptance and empowerment, as well as how she conquered her fears.
Candy revealed that before, she blamed herself for her son’s disability because she suffered from different kinds of strains throughout her pregnancy.
“Because I was very stressed when I was pregnant. I was emotionally stressed and physically stressed. Feeling ko nag-a-affect ‘yun [I feel that it somehow affects], feeling ko nagsa-shut off ang ibang parts ng brain ng bata [I feel that it shuts off some parts of the child’s brain],” the actress shared as she appeared on Tonight with Boy Abunda.
“Kapag nalaman mo kasi na ang anak mo may special needs, hahanap ka ng dahilan. So sinisisi mo kung sino ang may kasalanan [When you find out that your child has special needs, you’ll find a reason. So you blame someone who is at fault],” she said.
She also recalled the time when her beau left her moneyless a month before she gave birth to Quentin. Candy said she is not getting any support from her son’s father.
“No. I don’t know where he is,” adding that for a time they had communication because she sued him for child support.
“Inisip ko kasi pambayad ko na lang sa therapy, kesa ibayad ko pa sa lawyer [Instead of paying a lawyer, I thought that it would be better if I allotted it for therapy],” Candy explained.
When asked if she’s still angry with him, Candy answered “no” as she realized that once she gets extremely mad, she’s the only one being affected. Her spiritual adviser also told her that “Forgiveness is freedom.”
The actress’s physician persuaded her to only focus on the solution instead of lingering on the problem since no study has proven the connection between autism and stressful pregnancy.
Candy also said she did not blame God, stressing the she never questioned Him, and that as a matter of fact she went to Him immediately. The actress added that her only question was “what am I going to do?”
With the help of her family, Candy was able to raise Quentin, who is now a 14-year-old boy. Quentin’s verbal and motor skills are continuing to develop.
Apart from sharing her life as a mom, Candy said her book scrabbles around into the meaning of unconditional love.
“It’s not only for parents with kids with special needs. It’s for all human beings who know how to love and hope and want to be inspired and live a better life,” she ended.