The fathers are often the disciplinarians in Filipino households. They are the ones who set the curfews and impose the dos and don’ts. Filipino fathers have the role of being the protector of the family, and when they tend to be a bit overprotective, it results in clashes with their millennial kids.
Even though the days of “luhod sa asin o munggo” (an old form of punishment to discipline kids in the Philippines) are gone, some Filipino dads still use the ways of their parents or grandparents in disciplining their children, always comparing today’s generation with their generation and telling “noong panahon namin” stories.
Because of the generational gap, parenting today becomes more challenging to Filipino dads. Every father has his own parenting style, but here are helpful tips from Couples of Christ Canada on how to raise good sons and daughters in the new millennium:
- Understand that your children are living in a complex world. Most of them have access to good education, and advanced information is always readily available to them. However, their emotional growth might not be able to keep up with their intellectual growth. Have a more open mind and be patient with them.
- Do not be too concerned with what other people will say. Instead, focus on what is good for your children. Do not force them to conform to a certain image. Instead, allow them to make mistakes and help them discover their true selves.
- Respect the individuality of your children. Stop comparing one child to the other. No two children are alike. Have the wisdom to raise each one differently while loving them equally.
- Respect the dreams and hopes of your kids. Do not impose your plans and dreams on your children. Guide them in building their own lives.
- If you have daughters, keep in mind that you cannot expect girls of today’s generation to be submissive and passive. Girls of today are more articulate and they know what they want. They are more driven. Motivate them to succeed in their studies and careers.
- Let your children express their feelings. Listen to what they have to say with your heart. Practice two-way communication at home, and cultivate a friendship with your children.
There is really no one standard formula for successful parenting. What is most important is to always remember that parents are not the only ones who can teach their children about life. There are times that you can learn from your kids too, so learn from each other and as always, put God in the center of your relationship.