Staying Grounded and Grateful

This article is for three very different Filipinos who deserve kindness, not ridicule.

The first person I want to stand up for is Josh, Kris Aquino’s loving, neurodivergent son, who has been cruelly mocked by certain podcast hosts.

Josh is not “useless,” despite the hurtful comments from these profoundly ignorant and offensive podcast hosts. He plays the piano beautifully and, from what has been shared publicly, shows love and affection toward his mother, his younger brother, Bimby, and those who care for him.

A person’s worth is never defined by how closely they fit society’s expectations. Neurodivergence and disability are never reasons for ridicule. Having a podcast and an audience does not give anyone the right to humiliate another person for entertainment. As listeners and netizens, we can refuse to reward cruelty with our attention. The world is already unkind enough. Personally, I know how it feels like to live with mental health challenges. It’s not an easy life. 

Photo courtesy of the author. Husband and wife, Ron Zalko and Matte Laurel Zalko with Declan Taylor, a prominent young participant and fundraiser for the Canucks Autism Network. Declan’s story is heavily featured by the organization, detailing how he learned to ride a bike, swim, and play hockey with the Canucks Autism Network Coquitlam Sharks.

Compassion for people with disabilities, mental health challenges, and neurodivergence is especially close to our hearts (my husband’s and mine), not just in words but through our actions. At our business, Ron Zalko Fitness and Yoga, we proudly support the Canucks Autism Network charity in Vancouver every year. We also employ a young adult on the autism spectrum who has been part of our team for eight years now. He started out as a cleaner for us and because we believe in his abilities and he does an amazing job, we promoted him to front desk representative and personal trainer. We are proud to have him on our team, and his dedication is a wonderful reminder that people in the autism spectrum deserve opportunities to contribute, grow, and be valued for their abilities.

Inclusion means more than asking for acceptance; it means creating opportunities and treating people with dignity, respect, and understanding.

Photo courtesy of Pexels.

Let People Celebrate Their Little Luxuries

The other two people I want to stand up for are the woman mocked for calling Italianni’s fine dining and the young woman ridiculed for describing her Charles & Keith bag as a luxury brand.

Kudos to both of them. They were celebrating something they worked hard for and could afford. What is there to mock about that? Absolutely nothing.

We must remember that people come from different backgrounds, have different financial circumstances, and are at different stages in their lives. What feels ordinary to one person may feel extraordinary to another. And what we consider a small indulgence might represent a significant personal milestone for someone else.

Let people enjoy their victories, however big or small they may seem to us.

Italianni’s, in particular, brings back fond memories for me. When I was a single working mother in Manila, it was a restaurant I could comfortably afford, and I enjoyed every moment of dining there. I did not need a Michelin star or an extravagant bill to make the experience special. It was enough to enjoy a lovely meal and appreciate the fact that I could treat myself and my son.

Over the years, my idea of luxury evolved as my life circumstances changed. But that does not make the things I once enjoyed any less meaningful.

Photo courtesy of Pexels.

Every Life Has Different Chapters

I was fortunate to grow up in a well-to-do family. However, my siblings and I were taught early on to become financially independent and never rely on the family’s coffers. After college, I worked my way up and built my career through hard work, determination, and perseverance.

I also experienced difficult years as a single mother. I was fully responsible for supporting my only son financially and providing for our lives on my own. Those years taught me lessons about resilience, responsibility, and the true meaning of making ends meet.

Our lives changed dramatically for the better when I decided to return to Vancouver for good, hoping to give my son a brighter future. That decision marked an important new chapter for both of us.

My career flourished after we returned to Vancouver. After years of working alongside some of the city’s top business leaders, I eventually took the leap and built a business of our own with my mom and sister, which wasn’t successful but it was certainly a venture that I learned a lot from.

My son advanced in his education, too. Today, he is a kind, determined, and hardworking young man with a stable job as a software engineer. What makes me particularly proud is that he wants to continue developing his skills and advancing his career in technology. He understands that learning does not end with a degree or a job offer, and I admire his willingness to keep growing.

Today, I am grateful to be married to the right person, a man I chose and will continue to choose as my partner in life. There is a special kind of peace in a stable marriage, in having someone with whom you can share life’s responsibilities, celebrate its joys, and navigate its challenges.

I am equally grateful for the stability of the fitness club business that my husband and I are running. Our business provides us with a comfortable lifestyle and, more importantly, a meaningful purpose. Through our fitness and yoga business, we have the opportunity to encourage Vancouverites to stay fit, embrace healthier habits, and live active lives. Knowing that our work contributes positively to other people’s well-being gives our business a purpose beyond financial success.

These are the things that make me feel rich in ways that no price tag can capture.

Photo courtesy of the author.

Gratitude Keeps Us Grounded

For me, being grounded and grateful means recognising that the life I have today did not happen overnight. It came with hard work, sacrifices, difficult seasons, and decisions that required courage. And while I appreciate the beautiful things life has afforded me, I have never forgotten that life can change in an instant. We are not always going to be on top of the world. Life is a roller coaster, with its unexpected turns, uphill climbs, and occasional falls.

That is precisely why humility matters.

When I look at my life today, I do not measure my blessings solely by what I own. I measure them by what I have built, the people I love, the stability I enjoy, and the peace that comes from knowing I have worked hard for the life I lead.

I am grateful to be a mother to a good son who is finding his way in the world. I am grateful for a loving and stable marriage. I am grateful that our business continues to provide for us while allowing us to make a difference in our community. These are not small things. They are the foundations of a beautiful life.

Being grateful does not mean we stop aspiring for more. There is nothing wrong with having ambitions, setting goals, wanting financial security, or enjoying the rewards of our hard work. Gratitude simply reminds us to appreciate what we already have while continuing to work towards what we hope to achieve.

It also reminds us that circumstances can change. The person enjoying a modest meal today may be celebrating a much bigger milestone tomorrow. Someone who appears successful may be quietly struggling behind closed doors. And someone who seems to have very little may possess a richness of character, family, and happiness that money cannot buy.

We never truly know another person’s story.

Photo courtesy of Pexels.

Luxury Is Subjective, but Character Is Everything

Let me be clear: there is absolutely nothing wrong with appreciating designer labels, beautiful jewellery, expensive cars, fine dining, or the finer things in life. I enjoy them, too.

But we must never confuse the things we own with the people we are.

A handbag does not make someone more sophisticated. A luxury car does not automatically make someone successful. Dining at an expensive restaurant does not make someone more deserving of respect. And owning less does not make someone less accomplished.

Luxury is subjective. It depends on our experiences, our circumstances, and what brings meaning to our lives.

For one person, luxury might be a designer handbag. For another, it might be taking their family out for a meal they have been saving for. For someone who has spent years working tirelessly, it might simply be the freedom to sleep in, enjoy a quiet morning, or take a day off without worrying about the bills.

All these things deserve to be appreciated.

We should be less judgmental and more gracious. There is no need to diminish another person’s happiness just because their idea of luxury differs from ours. We can celebrate our own blessings without belittling someone else’s.

True class has very little to do with labels. It reveals itself in our manners, our generosity, our humility, and the way we treat people who have nothing to offer us in return.

Photo courtesy of Pexels.

Be Kind to Everyone, Regardless of Status

One of the most important lessons life has taught me is to treat everyone with respect, regardless of their job, income, education, or social standing.

Be as gracious to the taxi driver, delivery person, cashier, or janitor as you would be to someone sitting across from you in a boardroom.

A person’s occupation does not determine their worth. Every honest day’s work deserves dignity, and no one should have to earn the right to be treated with kindness.

You never know what someone is going through. You do not know how hard they have worked, what sacrifices they have made, or what burdens they carry quietly. Nor do you know where life may take any of us.

The people you meet on your way up may be the very same people you encounter on your way down.

Life has a way of reminding us that success is never a permanent guarantee, and humility is never a weakness. It is wisdom.

There is something remarkably strong and graceful about arriving at a phase where you no longer feel compelled to validate yourself to others. You settle into your own identity, assured in your character, and calm within the life you have constructed.

You begin to understand that the true meaning of success is about being content with what you have, appreciating how far you have come, and remembering the people and experiences that shaped you along the way.

Photo courtesy of Pexels.

A Beautiful Life Is One You Can Appreciate

As I grow older, I find myself appreciating stability, meaningful relationships, good health, family, and peace more deeply. I still enjoy beautiful things, but I no longer believe they are what make life beautiful.

It is the people around our table. The son whose future we look forward to watching unfold. The husband who continues to walk beside us. The business we have worked hard to build. The freedom to enjoy the fruits of our labour. And the gratitude that allows us to appreciate all these blessings without feeling the need to compare our lives with anyone else’s.

We all have different starting points, different struggles, and different definitions of success. We are simply living through different chapters of our stories.

So, enjoy the handbag. Celebrate the restaurant reservation. Buy yourself something lovely when you can afford it. Be proud of the milestones you have achieved, even when others do not understand their significance.

But through it all, stay grounded. Remember where you came from. Appreciate what you have. Respect those whose circumstances differ from yours, and never let success make you forget the value of kindness.

Because at the end of the day, the most beautiful thing we can wear is humility, the most valuable thing we can possess is gratitude, and the greatest measure of our success is not the price tag attached to our possessions, but the character we carry into every room.

Stay grounded. Stay grateful. Stay kind. Stay humble. Life is too precious to spend it looking down on others when we could be lifting one another up.