The Art of Aging

And just like that…this lady turns 57! I’m extremely grateful to have lived through 5 decades; two different centuries; two different millennia, and blessed to have lived on 3 different continents (Asia, Europe, and North America):

Enjoyed my childhood in the 70’s; 

Became a teenage rebel in the 80’s emulating Madonna;

Dated my way through the 90’s channeling Carrie Bradshaw;

Became a single mom in the 2000s, taking after single mom Lorelai Gilmore from Gilmore Girls;

I became a wiser, stronger, and more established career woman/mother/wife in the 2010s-to the present through hard work and discipline. Met The Last Great Love Of My Life at 50. Married him at 54. Wow. I never thought that I’d have a love life and a healthy, exciting sex life while menopausal, lol! 😂

Photo courtesy of the author.

I have gone from the party-line telephone (our landline number was 88-00-40 in Makati) with an operator for long-distance calls — to video calls to anywhere in the world. I have gone from dancing to vinyl records to dancing to online music. I have enjoyed Student Canteen, Top of the Pops and now, I’m enjoying YouTube. I’ve started writing handwritten letters and sending them either through telegram or snail mail to writing email and sending messages through WhatsApp. I used to write my diaries in a scented notebook with a lock. Nowadays, I write my diary in Notes on my iPhone (and sometimes in my column, Maria in Vancouver)!

I’ve had beepers, Nokia cellphones (5610 Nokia), Blackberries, and now, iPhone 16 Pro Max! I’ve gone from listening to programs on the radio to listening to podcasts. I’ve gone from watching shows on black and white TV, to watching shows on 4K HDTV. I used to rent VHS from Blockbuster, and now I watch movies on Netflix, Prime, Crave, and Amazon. 

I have ridden pedicabs, tricycles, jeepneys, London’s iconic black cabs, bicycles, mopeds, gasoline or diesel cars, and now I ride hybrids or 100% electric automobiles.

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I started with manual typewriters, learned electric typewriters, and got to know the first computers. I used to store my documents in floppy diskettes and CDs, and now I am living in a world of megabytes and gigabytes on my cell phones or iPads and storing documents in the cloud. I have gone from reading and researching through the Britannica Encyclopedia to Google and AI GP chat. I used to ask my yaya for everything, now I ask Siri!

In medical terms, I dodged polio, meningitis, infantile paralysis, H1N1 flu and now COVID-19. In the early 80’s and 90’s, there were only nose jobs, boob jobs, and facelift procedures. Nowadays, there are lip fillers (that make you look like a duck), cheek fillers, Botox, derrière enhancements (lol, sounds so terribly funny 🤣 — I can’t help but wonder if it makes your farts smell nicer too? lol,😂), brow / forehead lifts, eyelid surgery, eyelash extensions, otoplasty (ear esthetics to make sure you hear clearer the latest “Maritess”, lol 😂)! Oh, and the most bizarre thing, aesthetic genitalia plastic surgery: to make it either smaller, tighter, bigger or even prettier, lol, lol, lol! 😂 My favourite childhood Muppet character, Miss Piggy, is to blame: she started these trendy enhancements! Lol 😂

Photo of the author, Matte Laurel Zalko, wife of Ron Zalko (Vancouver’s Fitness guru and legend) and mother of William. Photo courtesy of the author.

And while we’re on this topic of scientific enhancements, I’m proud to say that I’ve had no Botox, no lip fillers, no cheek fillers, no facelifts, no genitalia aesthetics, no derrière enhancements— in fact, at 55, I got rid of my silicone breasts and decided to go au naturel! I attribute my youthful looks to great and healthy sex, happy and peaceful relationships with my husband, my son, my Sisterhood tribe, and colleagues. I keep a small inner circle, I stay away from drama, I get rid of toxic people and stressful relationships. I don’t smoke, I eat Mediterranean foods and I drink lots of water and bubbles (do you know that champagne is ketogenic? Lol 😂!) Seriously, I wholeheartedly accept aging with a most grateful heart and I intend to grow old gratefully and gracefully — with wrinkles, jiggly bits and all.

I’m so grateful to have had an analog childhood and a digital adulthood. Yes, I’ve been through a lot, but what a great life I have had so far! 

Yes—I dare say that I’ve seen it all!

Here are a few tips I’d like to share when it comes to the art of aging:

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Always choose to stay positive. We are what we think, so we always have positive thoughts. Always cultivate positive energy and emotions. Always remember that there’s a solution to every challenge. Always look at the brighter side of the world. Life is what we make of it. Choose to be happy always. It’s not easy, but we always know that we have it in us to make it happen. We are in control of our life’s decisions.

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Keep on moving. It is important to keep active. Move your body. Go for daily walks. Do at least half an hour of cardio exercises. Here’s a quick guide to a 30-minute workout for older people: start with your neck stretch, left and right. Slowly bring your right ear to your right shoulder and hold. Then repeat the same movement on the left. Do this three times on each side. Next, do the neck stretch, front and back. Slowly bring your chin to your chest and hold. Then look up to the ceiling with your chin up. Repeat this movement ten times. After which, do some shoulder rotations. Bring your hands to your side and complete 10 forward shoulder rotations, then 10 backward rotations. Afterward, do some marching high-knee exercises. Stand up and find your balance. You can hold onto the back of your chair if needed. Begin to march in place. Complete 12 high-knee movements on each leg. Repeat these three exercises ten times each! Aging also doesn’t mean stopping activities. You can join a running club, a walking club, or even be more daring by joining a rowing club! I have a girlfriend of a certain mature age who rows and runs, and she looks amazingly fantastic! In fact, if I didn’t know her age, I’d peg her as two decades younger than her actual age! 

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Stay on top of your health. I can’t stress enough the importance of doing an annual medical check-up to monitor your blood work, heart, mammograms and Pap smears. Understand your key health indicators like blood pressure, cholesterol levels, and blood sugar, and work with your doctor to manage them. Schedule routine appointments with your doctor for check-ups, screenings, and vaccinations. Regular screenings can help detect potential health issues early, when they may be more treatable. Early detection is key to longevity and prevention of disease. 

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Eat healthy. Focus on a diet rich in vegetables, fruits, leafy greens, lean proteins, whole grains, and healthy fats. Avoid eating ultra-processed foods that are loaded with sugar, unhealthy fats, and sodium. Practice the daily habit of mindful eating. Pay careful attention to your body’s hunger and fullness cues and, above all, practice portion control. 

Photo courtesy of the author..

Do intermittent fasting. I personally swear by this method. I do 16:8 intermittent fasting. This means I usually eat between 12pm to 8pm. I fast between 8pm and 12noon the following day. Intermittent fasting (IF) offers a variety of potential health benefits, including weight loss, improved insulin sensitivity, and reduced risk of chronic diseases. It can also lead to better heart health, cognitive function, and potentially even a longer lifespan. 

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Get lots of zzzz. Personally, I tend to sleep between 7-8 hours on weekdays. On weekends, I can sleep longer, around 10 hours sleep! I feel that the older I get, the more I sleep! Adequate sleep offers numerous benefits for physical and mental health. It enhances physical well-being by supporting heart health, regulating hormones, boosting the immune system, and aiding in muscle repair and growth. Mentally, sleep improves cognitive functions like memory, concentration, and decision-making, while also contributing to emotional well-being and stress reduction. 

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Cut off ties with toxic people and toxic relationships. I did! Not only did it do wonders for my mental health, it also promoted self-esteem, self-care, and self-love in me! By cutting off toxic relationships and toxic people, there were no more lies, deception, manipulation, gaslighting and jealousy. There was no more devaluing my worth and no more belittling or mind games. When you cut off ties with toxic people and relationships, you get rid of the drama and stress. You get rid of negative energy and vibes. Life is so short, why live it with misery and miserable people? 

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Choose your inner circle wisely. Again, I did! We have all the power, the wisdom and strength to choose who we want to have in our lives. Choose carefully the people in your inner circle. Choose people who possess positive energy and vibes. Choose people who share the same outlook on life as you do. Choosing a strong inner circle offers numerous benefits, including enhanced well-being, increased personal growth, and greater success. A supportive inner circle provides a positive influence, boosting your mood, health, and self-esteem. They can also offer accountability, challenge you to grow, and provide a safe space for honest conversations. In essence, choosing your inner circle wisely is about intentionally curating the people who will influence your life, your choices, and your future. By surrounding yourself with positive, supportive, and inspiring individuals, you create an environment that fosters growth, well-being, and success.