Celebrating My Womanhood

The month of March is all about celebrating women and what better way to celebrate it than by enjoying and acknowledging our feminine energy! The older I get, the easier it is for me to embrace my womanhood. I find that in my 50’s, I’ve learned to be true to myself and live the best possible life I can for myself. I’ve allowed myself to take up my own space in this world and do my bit to contribute to this world either through my writing or through my daily interactions with others by sharing my life experiences. 

At this stage in my life, I’ve learned to embrace my individuality and discovered that I do not exist merely in relation to men or others — I realize that I exist first and foremost as myself. But at the same time, I’ve also become more grateful and more content for the various roles I get to do at my age: as a mother, as a wife, and a business partner to my husband and as a writer/columnist. I feel so humbly blessed because I know that not everyone has these different roles late in their lives. Embracing your womanhood is all about finding balance and equanimity in your life and valuing yourself and your relationships with others.

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As an older woman, I’ve become more forgiving of myself and more accepting of my flaws and failures. I prefer to be imperfect, but free. I don’t regret anything in my life. Everything I’ve done, good or bad, has made me who I am today. And even if I’m not perfect, at least I’m real. Because happiness is not about being satisfied, but about accepting yourself without apology. By embracing my womanhood, I’m allowing myself to remain authentic and true to my core values and beliefs. 

I don’t feel the need to please anyone. I don’t feel the need to be validated or liked. I don’t need anyone’s approval anymore. Of course, I’m not always right and that’s perfectly fine. All I know is that I don’t owe anyone any explanation. You don’t need to explain your worth to people who refuse to see it. You don’t have to stay where you’re not valued.

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When I learned to accept and embrace my womanhood, I’ve become more mindful of what and who I allow into my life — whether it’s people, decisions, conversations, or even the quiet moments I give to myself. I’m choosing peace over pressure, calm over chaos. And for once, I don’t feel guilty about it. I choose to break ties with those who are not good for my mental health. I choose to block those I don’t feel comfortable with — I’m just not in a position to accommodate everyone and you know what, it’s ok to say no because like I said, I’m not here to please everyone. 

I choose not to connect with those I’ve outgrown and no longer gel with. I choose to move forward and onward in my life with those I genuinely click with because I prefer peace over drama.  Protect your peace — unapologetically. There’s something powerful about choosing to protect your peace; there’s complete freedom when you protect your peace. Unfriend. Unfollow. Block. Not just in social media, but even more so in real life. Prioritise yourself. Choose environments that nurture your growth, not drain it. Protecting your peace is not selfish—it’s necessary.

I’ve learned to embrace my femininity and womanhood through these various ways:

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Learn to accept yourself just as you are. Don’t be hard on yourself. Embrace your individuality. Embrace your flaws and failures. Be happy with yourself just as you are.

Always be gentle with yourself. It’s okay to be vulnerable at times. It’s okay to fall and fail and get back up again and again. It’s okay to explore the softer side of life from time to time. 

Always stay courageous. Fight for your goals, dreams, aspirations and above all, fight for your rights and for what you truly believe in. Be bold, be brave. 

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Learn to be comfortable in your own skin. Don’t compare yourself with others. Stay in your own lane and confidently ride your own wave. Don’t copy others, instead, be your own best version. Always do what works best for you. 

Have confidence in your abilities and keep on learning and improving. Know your worth. Know that you are more than enough and that you can contribute to the world through your efforts, your knowledge, and through your life experiences. At the same time, keep learning new skills, new ideas, and new experiences. Keep improving yourself and your skills. In life, there’s always room for improvement, growth and learning! 

Unleash your creativity. I’ve always found great comfort and joy when I am being creative. Whether it’s through painting, taking photographs, or writing — unleashing my creativity has helped me become more productive and happier knowing that I can make something beautiful and useful out of my life and get to share it with others. 

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Be supportive to others and find your own tribe. In life, I find that being genuinely happy for another person’s success and good fortune further enhances my own success and good fortune. I genuinely support others —most especially other women — because that’s what kind and confident women do. I’m proud and grateful to have found my own Sisterhood Tribe here in Vancouver. I’m grateful for our small circle and for the friendship and support we have for each other. In life, it’s vital to find your own tribe. It’s such a special feeling to belong to the right tribe! 

Be at one with nature. Go for long walks around nature and enjoy being at one with nature. Savour that fresh crisp air. Marvel at the beauty of nature. By doing so, you appreciate the beauty around you. You get to appreciate life more!

Take care of yourself physically, mentally and spiritually. Always prioritize your wellbeing and health. Eat healthy. Exercise regularly. Sleep well. Nourish your soul through spirituality. Health is our true wealth. Focus on feeling good and positive about your body and mind. The best kind of self-care I ever did was to walk away from those that poison my soul and because of this, I’m now happier and more at peace than ever.

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Take time for relaxation and recharging. Learn to take time for yourself and your body. Live a balanced lifestyle. Take regular breaks and rest. Don’t overthink and overwork yourself. It is important to recharge your energy and mind. 

Let go of toxic people and toxic relationships. Be extremely selective and careful with who you surround yourself with. Learn to be done with the drama and the gossip and above all, walk away from all of it. Get away from those who are stressful to be around with. Avoid people who say bad things about others because they are the type who will also say bad things about yourself to others behind your back. Protect your energy by removing yourself away from people or relationships that drain you, even from your own relatives. Know this: you’re not being rude, ungrateful or even disrespectful by cutting off ties with those who are not good for you. On the contrary, you’re prioritizing your own happiness and peace which is part of your human rights and you deserve it. Life is short. You need to live your life as happily as you can.

Love yourself first, help yourself first. Because if you don’t, who will? For you to have a solid relationship with others, you must love, respect and take care of yourself first. In order to help and support others, you have to help and nourish yourself first. You cannot be of help to others if you yourself need help.

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Practice gratitude at all times. When you’re grateful for the things that you have done and have in your life, more positive things come in your life. Gratitude can help boost your mood and overall being. Make it a daily habit to find things that you’re grateful for in your life. Being alive itself is more than enough to be thankful for. Being surrounded by your loved ones is a lot to be thankful for! Having the freedom to choose is something to be thankful for. Having a roof over your head, eating meals, and drinking clean water are things we must be grateful for. Be grateful for your simple joys!

Practice mindfulness. I indulge in mindfulness through my daily journals. I write my thoughts. I do regular breathing exercises. I meditate. I am mindful of my surroundings. I am mindful of others. I am mindful of my own life and my own business. 

Express yourself clearly. Do not be afraid to express yourself by voicing your opinion, feelings and thoughts clearly but also politely and respectfully. Avoid being confrontational (to be honest with myself, I’m guilty of this at times because I’m naturally emotional but, I’m a work in progress and I am constantly learning and evolving so I’m slowly getting better in terms of being less confrontational). Think carefully before you speak. Your words have consequences. 

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Value your relationships with those you love and love you back unconditionally. Personally, I can’t thank the Universe enough for blessing me with a son who is kind, loving and a son who is working hard to create a good life for himself. Moreover, I’m so thankful for the close and tight knit relationship I have with my son. We have an open and respectful communication with each other. As his mother, I’m fully supportive and accepting of his choices in life and of him as an individual — as his mom, I’m not one to judge. I’m always here to guide and to listen to him without prejudice. 

As a wife, I’m also grateful for having found the right man who loves me and respects me without conditions. I married a man who knows and understands the true meaning of partnership. It’s a blessing to find love and companionship late in life. It’s a blessing to be truly in love with each other. It’s a blessing to have someone you truly enjoy spending time with (in my case, 24/7, lol)! Even after being together for 7 years (4 years as lived-in partners, 3 years legally married), we still love to date each other every weekend because being married to each other late in life has to be celebrated! It’s a beautiful feeling to share your heart, the ups and downs, and everyday life with the right partner. 

I’m also grateful to belong to a small circle of Sisterhood Tribe where there’s no negative energy, only positivity, respect, genuine care, compassion and kindness to each other. Finally, with my son, my husband, and my Sisterhood Tribe, I’m grateful to have a family I can finally call my very own! I’m enjoying every moment with those I love because I’m realistic about life: nothing lasts forever so cherish every moment with each other because after all life is indeed fleeting.

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Lastly, embracing my womanhood is all about being kind and generous to myself and not feeling bad about it. The world is already full of unnecessary critique and harsh words — we don’t need to add ours to the chaotic mix. Always be kind to yourself because you owe it to yourself. Because of being kind to myself, I’ve learned to celebrate myself everyday as a woman, as a mother, as a wife and a business partner to my husband, and as a columnist and writer. After all, I only have one life to live so I aim to make it a fulfilling life!